Under a Spanish Sun #9

It’s easy if I don’t think
don’t blink and
just drink myself into a stupor
absolutely super.

Too many daybreaks
headaches
heartaches and
it all takes its toll.

If I stay sober long enough
I can get through this
feeling of feeling rough
and do
proper stuff,
if I tough it out, say no
to one more go
on the roundabout
I can get straight.

But the bottle takes a hold of me
and there goes my sobriety
until the next time I am
sick with the anxiety of
not fitting into society.

It’s so easy if I don’t think.

© 2018, John Smallshaw.