Falling off a log

This twenty first century
malarkey
is wearing a little bit thin
what would have suited me
was the late nineteenth century,

I’d go back there
but they won’t let me in
because I have no style
no panache
not even got a mustache
so
I am stuck here with Covid
trying hard not to catch it,

my mum used to say,
‘you’ll catch it when your dad gets home’
but she didn’t mean Covid
she meant a thick ear
and if you’re from the North,
you’ll know what one of them is.

© 2020, John Smallshaw.